I am very impulsive and quick-tempered and multiple times I ride the flow of emotions too high, therefore I have said things that later, upon a second, third and hundredth thought, were not the most assertive or kind option, I´ll admit that.

Hence I am very sure that I should not write these lines in my current emotional state, but on the other hand I write what and how I feel, this is the main purpose of this blog or whatever it is.

I am Facebook addicted for quite some time now and I use it for a wide range of purposes, the whole palette 🙂 from dog videos to keeping in touch with people I have not seen since I was five, from reading complex articles to debating without a foreseeable conclusion, the whole package.

I post quite a lot, because I frequently find the virtual life more interesting than my actual one (which I think many of us do and yes, I know that is not very healthy for our mind). I acknowledge without hesitation the benefits and advantages this platform brings to our lives, but this is not my point now.

Given that I understand that Facebook friendships are not always the strongest ones and I also fully recognize that this social tool has different degrees of meaning for each of us, I sometimes struggle when I realize how limited, restrained and I´ll tell it as it is, fake, our little circles are. All social patterns are present on Facebook as they are in real life, but we get the chance to create our “likeable” feed and that sometimes fires back at us.

One click to the left, one to the right, and you are a step away from a billion photos detailing a person´s life to…..nothing.  We add and delete others´stories as if we would change our socks. We judge, we comment, we like even if we dislike, we are too proud to press a single button for half a millisecond because we argued with someone a century ago, we post #loveforever #myhubbybubby #loveofmylife even if the relationship is #byebyeforever, we consider that the photo of our food is more important than its actual taste, we spend more time checking our notifications than actually living. I could go on forever and I include myself in most of the “we´s”, I am guilty as charged.

All this rant comes from 2 recent situations.

One I won´t detail too much because it is just not worth it, but the summary is that I got unfriended by surprise (but not really, if that makes sense) and I got hurt even though I can´t stand that person and I was hurt so many times by her actions that I gave up years ago. Still, I was offended, because my mind puts the social norms and the Facebook falseness above reality, as it seems.

The second one stings quite a lot also and not for superficial reasons, but from a deeper wound which does not seem to heal. I have 373 friends. I needed help which I knew for sure that some of them were able to provide. It was not urgent, but it was for a cause which means the world to me. When I posted a photo with my dogs or when I share some video from the beach, the likes and comments are pouring like a broken pipe. For this I only got one (1, uno, ein, un) like, from a friend already familiar with this cause.

It might seem that I make no sense and I make no excuse for that. But I am just wondering, why are we really using Facebook? How did it become such a major presence in our lives? How can a blue little icon influence our state of mind in such a twisted manner?

As always, it´s not Facebook, it´s us. 🙂

Rant over, hope to be back in better spirits.

Featured image: Photo by Daniel Olah on Unsplash

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